Monday, July 30, 2012

A TRUTH’S DESTINY


The compartment was fairly empty for a Saturday afternoon. She thought that it was probably not season yet for travel. But the thing she felt a little queer about was the guy sitting opposite to her. It had been an hour and he had not taken his eyes off the scenery his window was offering, not even to have a peek at a pretty girl sitting right in front.

“Anything particularly beautiful you are looking at?” He was taken aback by the hint of sarcasm in her voice.

“Nothing particular. But beautiful, yes!” He looked at her for the first time. Eyes so expressive and purposeful! She gave him the “care-to-explain-yourself” look.

He smiled. It was an innocent one. “Here, come this side and see for yourself.”

She came and sat by his side. The sight was perfect. They didn’t speak a word for a long time.  It was the sun’s last act of the day and the most beautiful one!

He spoke first. “What a spectacle! It actually looks like our train is chasing the sun down into those curvy mountains. He seems to be pretty tired after the day’s work and we are catching up on him. On his way, he stumbles upon those gorgeous trees which add their color to his light. What a delightful duet!”  

She soaked in the beauty that his eyes had just conjured. “My visualization was not so enthralling. What are you? A  writer? A poet?”

“No, someone less profound! I am a photographer.”

“Wow.. I could never be one!” There was a subtle pain in her voice.

They watched the sun as it disappeared into oblivion. “It rests to scorch another day.” She sighed as the last traces of the sun left their eyes.

He took a few beats to crystallize his thoughts. “For the last half an hour, we have seen the sun grow on us. Its golden shimmers accentuated the beauty and serenity of every animal, foliage and emotion they touched. As our train got tantalizingly close to the mountains, the sun was bigger, clearer and more meaningful than ever. And then he disappears leaving us to be consumed by the darkness. Does this mean anything to you?”

“I see you are poised to say something profound. Go on.”

“Well, profound or stupid, is for you to decide. It reminds me of the shallowness and the false hopes and promises that make up our lives. Don’t you share my melancholy?” He looked at her intriguingly.

She smiled playfully. “Not really. I think he dims his light for us to search for it within.”

“Now that is profound indeed. What are you, a philosopher?” He winked.

“Well, something more human. I am a painter.”

“I am sure having such expressive eyes helps! They can temporarily arrest nature’s splendor and you can immortalize it later on paper.” She gushed at his poetic compliment.

They were about to go back to their silence when he suddenly asked her a question she was hoping he wouldn’t. “Why did you say you couldn’t be a photographer?”

After being pensive for a while she opened up. “Because my dad was one!” This time he couldn’t see any emotion in her eyes. “And he was brilliant at it. The best! He took several pictures which were adored and celebrated. They brought him name and fame. But most of these photos were meant to portray a world that was not real. A world that was clinically enhanced; sprinkled with artificial beauty, fake emotions and non existent colors! The world as you want it to look like! A world of your dreams!” He did not interrupt her as emotions were slowly starting to erupt.

 “And then one day he took his best photograph. It just told a simple truth. It was a piece of art. Sometimes, that is the worst curse. It shows life in its purest and darkest shade. It is too much for one to take. It tells you a story you so hoped didn’t exist. And the story of this photo changed my dad. It made every other photo of his look inconsequential and meek. It was the last photograph he ever took!” She was still breathing heavily but had slowly managed to gain her composure back.

A stunned silence ensued. “It must have been a very potent picture!” He whispered softly.

“Sure it is!” She took out the photo from her bag and gave it to him. It was a breathtaking capture of a man was carrying his son on his shoulders. He looked at it intensely for a while and then handed it back to her. “It is priceless.” His eyes had a semblance of torture.


“What happened? I thought you would want to see that picture a little longer.” She could not understand the emotion he was going through.

He smiled contritely. “If you allow me, I will keep looking at this picture for the rest of my life.” She did not understand but didn’t want to press, fearing she might hurt a raw wound. But that had already been done.

“Well, you see, I don’t have a photo of my father and I never seem to like any of mine.” He said nonchalantly.

She was shuddering. “Is this…. You?”

He was gently caressing the man in the photo. “Yes. I am the unfortunate son of this man who did not have any reason to smile in his whole life but found every opportunity to do so. He spent his whole life with a heavy baggage on his slender shoulders. In the morning he would carry me to school. It was 10 kilometers from our village and he had to cross a dense forest barefooted. He would then chop wood in the forest the whole day. He would carry my little baby sister along with him to the forest. He made her a little cradle in the woods and the birds would sing her lullaby. In the evening he will carry the wood to the local timber house and sell it to them for a paltry price. He would then come to fetch me again. Those three hours on my father’s shoulders were my most precious moments of the day. He would tell me about every single sight, event and incident on the way. I started seeing the world through his eyes. I wish time had frozen at that very moment. But that was not to be. May be I was too much a burden for him to shoulder! Or may be, I was not destined to play with my baby sister!

A famous actress of that time adopted me from my father; for a good sum I guess. Thanks to your dad’s priceless photo that melted her heart. My father was happy that I was going to get a life that he could never give me. But I knew he cried and bled internally. I knew his heart would never be able to give me up. He wanted to carry me on his shoulders all his life. But life is cruel. It takes your soul and you can’t even cry!

Time slowly heals you. I started afresh. For 10 years, I lived a life of solitary luxury. I had everything. I even had love. My new mother was not the best but she took good care of me, though I never felt the mother in her! But I had nothing to complain until one day she had a son of her own. Now I was just a complication! So she got rid of me. To be fair, I was well taken care of. She put me in college and fixed a decent accommodation as well. So here I was, after being rooted out from my father’s heart and shoulders and planted in a place where I never fit in, alone, out in the world to find a soil again.

I had always looked for an inspiration, a calling to live or die for, and I found it through your dad. Strange it may seem, but he shaped my destiny! This unknown man, who immortalized my father in a frame of memory, who gave me new parents (for a while), a great house to live, a great school to study, gave my father and my sister the opportunity for a better life; he became my idol. He still is! That is why I am a photographer today!”  

His eyes were moist. So were hers! “You never tried to find your father again?”

“I wanted to. So many times. But then, what would I tell him? That I have been an orphan for 15 years! That I have everything I haven’t even asked for but not the one thing I have always longed for: his love. He would have imagined great things about his son. I do not intend to bring down the fond castles he has built in my memory. He will not be able to forgive himself. He has had enough agony for one lifetime already. Sometimes it is best to live in the truth we have come to believe in. I am happy to live with the belief that my father and sister are happy somewhere! I can’t take any other truth!” He was choking for words.

She caressed his shoulders soothingly. She had no words to console him. She knew that none were necessary. She put the photo on his lap. “You can keep the photo. I think it means much more to you!” He had no words to thank her. He knew none were necessary.

She moved away and took out her diary and started writing something. He looked at her eagerly.  

“It’s nothing. I just like to record memorable conversations.”

He smiled affectionately. “I am so glad you thought this one is memorable!” He was still looking at the photo. Tears were parting his eyes profusely. She finished her diary and went away to shed a tear of her own.

He glanced at her diary. Something inside him urged him to read it and he tried hard to battle that thought. A truth’s destiny hinged on his action!

Excerpt from her diary:
How can I tell you that this photograph means as much or more to me!

I wish I could tell you that I am your little sister. I wish I could ask you to sing me a lullaby.

How can I tell you how much our father loved us? How can I tell you that he would have never given you away if he was not dying? Yes. Dying slowly but surely!

I cannot tell you how many hours I have spent looking at this photo, touching and feeling the two of you.

How can I tell you that my father watched our father die in my arms and then took me in his arms? I cannot tell who I love the most, but both these men are our heroes!

And how can I bring my heart to tell you that both of them are no more! I have suffered the agony of watching them die: one of pain and the other of grief. How can I let you go through the same?

This photograph is our destiny. It is our doom. It broke us. It made us. I can’t allow it to break us again. I am just happy it brought us together, what if it was for just a moment! Sometimes it is best to live in the truth we have come to believe in!

                                                                                                                 A SHORT STORY BY RAJ


This post is part of the contest A picture can say a thousand words.. on WriteUpCafe.com

116 comments:

  1. woww...brilliantly woven Raj. I almost cried in the middle, but then I didn't. Boy, you were successful by the end. Tears in my eyes. Very touching and beautiful. I hope it's for that contest right? good luck. Loved it.

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    1. Thank you so much Latha for the effusive praise. I am really overwhelmed. I am touched to hear that the story made your eyes moist. :)

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  2. Raj...Every word is well chosen and couched into this exhilarating narration.This story is going to haunt me for a long long time. The beautiful use of language made this a mesmerizing read, Raj!! This is not a run of the mill stuff...a winning piece! All the best..

    I liked this sentence very much..
    "Sometimes, that is the worst curse. It shows life in its purest and darkest shade. It is too much for one to take. It tells you a story you so hoped didn’t exist. "--- Exactly :)loved it!

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    1. Thank you so much Panchali for those wonderful compliments. I couldn't have asked for more. This means so much to me. :)

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    2. And those sentences: They are my favorites too. Really felt great when I wrote them. :)

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  3. This is awesome Raj...So well conceived and executed...I am overwhelmed

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Rajrupa. Am so glad that this story touched a chord in your heart. Thank you very much for the lovely comment. :)

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  4. Nice story...I'm not the right person to review the story written . I can only write, I enjoyed the narration.

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    1. Thank you so much Ranjana. Such a wonderful comment from you is worth much more than any review. :)

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  5. A picture perfect!
    I was stunned for 2 mins after reading this story. A master piece ..

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    1. A very warm welcome to you here. Am so glad you liked it very much. Thank you so much for the lovely comment. :)

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  6. I am speechless,this story touches the very core of my heart.You are an expert at bringing out the emotions through well chosen words-as if painting a picture.It is a sure winner!

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    1. Your comment made me so happy Indu. This is what I write for. :) Your comment has left me speechless. Thank you so much. :)

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  7. Lucid prose and terrific content. Ah, unforgettable characters as well. The ending was the icing on the cake..u know just when I thought it couldn't get any better, it did..and how! It made my eyes well up...good luck for the contest :)

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    1. Thank you so much Sudha for the out of the world compliments. You have made my day. :) I am so happy that this story brought tears to your eyes. I could have asked no more as a writer.

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  8. Hey, this is phenomenally well-written. See, I knew I was competing against the likes of you which is why I chose to go with 55 fiction :). Good luck with the contest. You have a fantastic shot at winning.

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    1. Thank you so much Meera for the phenomenal comment. Your 55s are outstanding and you are indeed a master of that genre. :)

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  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. Silly Me I got so engulfed in your post that I dint see your Post script and wrote all this
      GOOOOOOO WIN THIS COMPETITION :D its all yours!!!

      OMG This is exceptionally awesome Raj, I was fully in tears and just cant tell you how much I liked this post, I read it again and again, loved the words, loved the suspense loved loved and loved it totally. I have a question,
      Sometimes I will be so moved by a picture that I will want to put it and write something around it!!! So was this post like that? If not how did u get such a beautiful connecting picture to the post?
      ----Dont Answer I now know the answer :D

      Trust me every word is so good in that loved it so much!!! I started remembering my train journeys and the beauty of it, and it sailed to photography which I always believe just cant do justice to the beauty what eyes see and then BAM!!! the story was so strong that I got totally engrossed in it. BIG HUG Raj its just tooooooooo awesome :D keep writing will love to read it always!!!


      OOPS I had a post script message :D it dint get posted :D it read like this
      PS: I just cant stop going gaga over things\people I like, And I have checked about my over excitement with doctor ;) so its perfectly normal and not fatal ;) So dont mind !!!

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    3. Ramya... omg... you have just made my day for the next 2 days. :) Such a breath-takingly lovely comment. Can't thank you enough. I am so glad you liked the story so much. As a writer I cannot ask for more. It gives me immense pleasure that this story invoked tears in your eyes. And you are right.. sometimes things that have happened in our life act as wonderful inspirations. My train journeys, the scenes I have seen peeping out of the window have all stayed evergreen in my mind and heart. I guess the story has some such reflections. :)

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    4. You have said I need not answer that question. But I still will. :P Actually I had written this story (not exactly in the same way though) without seeing the picture or the contest. But then when I saw the picture, it touched my heart very much that I decided to take part in the contest. Hence I re-wrote the story in a different way with the picture in mind and it has turned out better I should say. ;)

      But thank you so much for showering me with so many compliments. This coming from you means so much. :)

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  10. Gosh! You just blew me away by this story. Briallinat, absolute brialliant. You have got to win this competition. You have a way with words and this is just brialliant/ Still spell bound

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    1. Jenny... thank you so much for your mind blowing comment. :) Really means a lot. Your effusive praise makes me feel so elated. More than anything I am so glad that the story touched your heart. :)

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  11. “What a spectacle! It actually looks like our train is chasing the sun down into those curvy mountains. He seems to be pretty tired after the day’s work and we are catching up on him. On his way, he stumbles upon those gorgeous trees which add their color to his light. What a delightful duet!” This line egged me to read on further to find out what this post would unfold. and unfold it did a beautiful canvas, which was painted and has been clicked in my memory as one of the most beautiful stories that i have come across.

    The closing line "This photograph is our destiny. It is our doom. It broke us. It made us. I can’t allow it to break us again. I am just happy it brought us together, what if it was for just a moment! Sometimes it is best to live in the truth we have come to believe in" , was simply a beautiful ending to a fabulous beginning..

    I must say, you add a lot more depth to the emotions portrayed in this post. The 5 character shave been well defined short yet crisp.

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    1. Welcome back Menachery. It is so good to have you in my blog after a long time. And thank you so much for the wonderful wonderful compliment. You have really made my day. :) By the way you have summarized the story and highlighted the high points, I can see how it has impacted you. What more can I ask for as a writer! :) Thank you once again and hope to see you more and more. :)

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  12. Hi Raj

    You are one hell of a story teller...Superb piece with unexpected twists! Terrific!

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    1. Jaish.. :) Thank you so much for the out of the world compliment. :) I am deeply elated and it means so much that the story touched your heart. :)

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  13. A nice one very well told.My best wishes

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    1. Thank you so much KP for your lovely comment and wishes. :) Means a lot.

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  14. I had written a comment in the morning which is probably squirming somewhere in the great galactic blackhole called Internet.

    I am here then, to read this tale of breathtaking beauty, roiling emotions and stunning twists once more. Beginning with a teasingly romantic setting where two young hearts appraise each other as they absorb the myriad shades of a sundown glowing through the living and the inanimate, the story slips into the intractable darkness of human fortitudes as if fallen through a rabbit hole. Soon enough, it takes a steep turn into an uncharted angle again. And then as if it wasn't enough, we are left speechless with a final blinding flash of a twist.

    Believe me, Raj, I can count on my little finger the number of writers who can touch my heart like this. Keep on glowing then, and let that shimmering river of words keep flowing.

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    1. Umashankar.. every single comment of you makes me speechless. And I wait for every comment of yours with bated breath too. :) I must tell you... your summary of the story is more beautiful than the story itself. And every compliment of yours is a gem for me to cherish. :) Thank you so much for the generous shower of praises. :) You make my soul happy! :)

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    2. And there can't be a better privilege for me than being in that short list of writers who touch your heart. What more can I ask for? And as you already know.. you have always been in that short list of brilliant writers of mine. :)

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  15. Raj, honestly this is one of the best writing I have seen this far with such a lovely blend of emotions and twists! You are an amazing story teller!

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    1. Rahul Sir.. I am speechless. I can't thank you enough for that wonderful compliment. I feel like I have taken that one best and perfect photograph every photographer dreams of taking. :) You have left my heart brimming with happiness. :)

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    2. Ramya.. I guess I can't thank you enough but I will keep trying. :) Your comments invariably fill my heart and soul with so much happiness. :)

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  16. One of your best to date! Amazingly written! Truly moving!

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    1. Thank you so much Krupaa for showering generous praise. I am so glad that the story touched a chord in your heart. Makes me so happy. :)

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  17. I have read many stories in this contest but this one touched me too deeply. What twists and turns! It brought out the workings of destiny and fate and incredible meetings and partings. Mail me when you win the contest :)

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    1. Thank you so much Zephyr for the most heart warming compliment. Coming from you, it means so much. :) You have said it so well... the workings of fate and destiny are really fascinating. :) I am really overwhelmed by your wonderful praise. :)

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  18. Amazing Read..! Keep posting more such epic stories!

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Time Traveller. Am so glad you liked the story so much. Thank you so much for the wonderful compliment.

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  19. whenever i visit this blog, i expect nothing less than a masterpiece!! and masterpiece it is. all the best for the contest!!!

    incidentally, even i was writing a story on a train journey when i visited your blog although it's an entirely different story and the pace at which i write, i think, i will be able to finish it in one or two months :D

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    1. Deb my friend.. your comment soothes and delights my heart every single time. :) Thank you so much again for the lovely compliment.

      Ohh wow.. That is so lovely. Would be very interested in reading this story of yours. :) Am very eagerly awaiting it. :)

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  20. First, How did you come up with the idea? I mean this photo is sad and I have read few straight forward posts on it but coming up with this remarkably beautiful story. I mean this is awesome. You can write in the finest of language but with this story line you have proved your genius as a writer, yet again.

    Truly marvelous! Teach me how to write stories, please:)

    And I loved the way you wrote the conversation between the boy n girl, specially the way you incorporated the thought of writer, poet, photographer and painter.

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    1. Saru.. what can I say! It is such a pleasure to read your comment every single time and I expect and wait for it so eagerly. :) Thank you so much for those lovely compliments. Coming from you, it means so much. :) I am really humbled.

      Saru.. you are one of the best writers I have seen. And your short stories are really wonderful too. I really am a fan of your short stories. There is nothing for me to teach you. :) But my only request would be that you should write more of those! :)

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    2. And regarding the conversation: I thought you would like it a lot. :) And I am glad that it struck a chord with you. It is really glad when a reader looks at it the exact same way as the writer. :)

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  21. Agree with Saru, beautifully expressed. I should say WOW!
    Loved it!

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    1. Thank you so much Mithilash for the wonderful comment. I am so glad that you liked this story so much. :)

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  22. Sigh!! Amazing post... I wept reading this. What else can you expect from a reader? Tears are enough I guess :) Keep writing!!

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Ranjana. Thank you so much. There is nothing more that a writer wants. Tears are certainly enough! I am touched that this story made you cry.

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  23. This is a Master Piece Raj.. Right from the start to the end its just perfect.. So beautifully you have weaved the story, only a genius can do it.. So many touching moments blended with so deep emotions in such a short story is splendid. No doubt you are the winner.. :) This is another post of yours where I got the goosebumps and teary eyes both at the same time.. The other post was your guest post in which you have written about your parents marriage story :) You are Brilliant Raj:) Keep up the good work:)

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    1. This post also made me remember Laxman about whom you must be knowing as you have read my post on him. Well, his Dad did not agree to give Laxman to my uncles friend :) After reading this post I feel that it was the best decision he has taken for his child:) Thank u Raj :)

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    2. What can I say Sonia! I am simply overwhelmed by this wonderful comment. You have made my heart swell with happiness by showering so many wonderful wonderful compliments. What else can a writer want? It means so much to me coming from a writer like you. Thank you so much. You have made my day!

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    3. How can I forget Laxman? That was a memorable post that gave me goosebumps! I totally agree that he had taken the best decision. :) I will never forget your heartfelt writing on that. :)

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  24. My God, you should look for a career in story writing in Bollywood! Seriously!

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Anupama. I am really overwhelmed by this fantastic compliment. Can't thank you enough for this. :)

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  25. Superb, simply superb. Loved the narration, the control on the story and how it all unfolded.

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    1. A very warm welcome to you here. Am so glad you loved the story so much. Thank you so much for the wonderful compliment. :)

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  26. Your writing is becoming more and more powerful...more deep, more thoughtful...turn of phrase is of no use unless the content is rich. This is a lovely uplifting story on a day when rains lash Bengaluru, my heart sinks in an empty space, and I remember...

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    1. Thank you so much Bhavana for the out of the world comment. I am glad this story made your day and you found solace amidst rains.

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  27. Raj, how do you come up with such stories? There is a depth of emotion, longing and love in this sad story. What amazing twists and so much packed in such little space. You are a brilliant writer! You have outdone yourself, my friend, with this one.

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    1. Thank you Rachna for the effusive praise. I can't thank you enough and I can't tell you how happy I feel as a writer. :)

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  28. Very profound and touching write.

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Janu. And thank you for the lovely comment. :)

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  29. Very beautifully woven story :) Very touching!

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Nikita. Am so glad you liked the story. :)

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  30. breaktakingly beautiful! you just blew my mind away with this story! I had always thought ur story of the wedding prank ( i guess.. wedding bells) was ur best, but this is several notches higher! that story i must have read ,like ages ago, and it was still fresh in my mind, now i guess, this will be etched in my mind too! great work!

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    1. Ahh... thank you so much for the lovely lovely comments. I liked the wedding bells one too. :) Am so glad you liked that very much too. :) That this story will stay fresh in your mind for a long time is the best compliment I could ever dream of. :)

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  31. I don't know what else to say which others haven't already said. One of the best short stories I have ever read. You are a true genius in terms of story telling and this post just accentuates that point. I am truly at a loss of words.

    It was an honor and a privilege reading this story. :)

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    1. Akshay... every comment of yours means so much to me. :) And it is something I eagerly await for every single time I write something. :) Thank you so much for making my day with this wonderful comment.

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  32. WOW.. I was reading your reply to my comment in the last post , where you said Sir ji any advice coming from me is good , NOW NOW , not true that one , you have me thinking now. and as others said blew my mind too

    indeed a lovely story .. and i would like to say thanks for sharing this with all of us ..
    a picture does say a lot of words.. and those words make a story as you just did


    Bikram's

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    1. Sir jii.. It is a privilege to get such a compliment from you. :) Thank you so much, Am so glad this story touched your heart. :) Thank you for your lovely words.

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  33. Amazing story lines. The story was gripping from the start and you must consider writing as your profession :)

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    1. Thank you so much Uma. I wish your words come true. :) Can't tell you how much delighted I am to see this lovely compliment of yours. :)

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  34. I really have nothing new to add to the list of wonderful accolades that you have received. This is a truly intriguing story with great narrative!! Good Luck for the contest!!

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    1. A very warm welcome to you here Amruta. Am so glad you liked the story and the narrative. :) And your story was great too. Good luck to you too.

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  35. beautifully written!!!hats off...:-)

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    1. A very warm welcome to you Bhavana. Am so glad you liked it. Thank you so much.

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  36. This is brilliant story-telling; seemingly scattered pieces in the beginning but in the end seamlessly joined. I liked everything about the story: the expression, the intrigue, the pain, the ray of hope etc. The fact is that in the ultimate ananlysis we are all related to each other; though we don't realise it

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    1. Ahh... great to see you here after some time Sir. :) Am so glad that this story touched a chord somewhere in your heart. Means a lot to get such an appreciation from you. :)

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  37. This is your Masterpiece Raj. It is Brilliant. The Plot, The Characters, the connection, the emotions and how it all unfolds in front of them. How the Photo was significant for both the characters. The Father. Oh my god, I just loved this. This is one of the best posts I've ever come across. Just loved the way you have penned it all down, in a very engaging way. For a minute when I saw the photo and read the story, I felt I was going to break down any moment. So touched by the Story. God Bless you. Keep writing more :-)

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    1. Ashwini.. I am really humbled by your lovely lovely comment. Am so glad that you felt that this is one of my best. :) And what more can a writer ask for other than a tear in the reader's eyes. You made the writer in me feel proud and I am indebted to you for that.

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  38. I don't know what to write..I am short of words..never thought that it will take such a twist..very touchy and melancholic..thanks for visiting my blog from where I got to know about your blog..Thanks a lot..

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    1. Thank you so much Ranita. I am so glad you liked the story. It is my pleasure to know you through your blog as well. :) Keep writing. :)

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  39. I don't know who you are and have no reason to shower praise on you unnecessarily. Let me confess that while stumbling on indiblogger I found this and your story is so moving, I am in tears. The descriptions are so vivid, I can imagine the scene. As a wildlife photographer and filmmaker, I am often bowled over by the beauty unfolding before me.

    Your story raises so many questions. Who is poor? A man who has less of money is more poor than a man having no joy, freedom and peace?

    This story is worthy of being published in a book.

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    1. Sabyasachi... You have made my heart swell with happiness and pride. Your comment touched me so much. And your lovely compliment has made my day. How I wish one day I would publish a book. It is a dream alright. But some day... :)

      If a wild life photographer and a filmmaker like you feels that the scene was vivid, then I couldnt have asked for more. :) Thanks once again.

      Delete
  40. Very interesting and very depressing, but honestly it is like a movie, maybe you should write a script for a movie..congratulations

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Vikram for this out of the world compliment. You just made my day. :)

      Delete
  41. U have an amazing talent.. and a real Story Teller! U kept me gripped till the end... Beautifully written! All emotions wonderfully captured!

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    1. Thank you so much Pranita. Am so glad the story touched your heart. Makes me feel very happy.

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  42. My, my, my my! Raj! you are a master story teller. Great story! Amazingly crafted and beautifully written.
    That scene outside the train's window was so vivid. I feel like I saw that sunset myself (and also the mountains and trees and winding path that the train took). That end was least expected. Reading this was such a pleasure.

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    Replies
    1. Ahh Divya.. Thank you so much for the generous praise. I can't say how delighted I am. Sometimes certain scenes (especially those involving nature) stay so fresh in our memory. I guess it was one such reproduction. :)

      Delete
  43. Bring out the 'Share' buttons, Raj :).

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    Replies
    1. :) Thank you so much. But guess am a bit illiterate. Can you tell how to get them?

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  44. Goodness Raj, this is a masterpiece. What a story and how well it has been penned down! Every part was perfectly etched out-from the beautiful scenery to the lives of people involved in the story. Didn't see the twist coming. Lovely. A prize-winning entry! All the best.

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    Replies
    1. A very warm welcome to you Uma. Am so glad you felt that the story was good enough. Means a lot to me. :)

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  45. wat a story...i am speechless...a story with so powerful emotions, and so beautifull crafted sentences.....unique...after a long time i ve read a story of this kind:)

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    1. A very warm welcome to you here Chetan. :) Am so glad that this story found an echo in your heart. Thanks for the beautiful comment. :)

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  46. You should be a novelist! XD

    http://upyourstwice.blogspot.in/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A very warm welcome to you here. And thank you so much for the lovely compliment. Novelist.. I so wish I could be.. one day! :)

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  47. Replies
    1. Hi Saru.. :) I think it should be out in a couple of days. :)

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    2. Saru.. :) Sorry forgot to tell u.. the results were out sometime back. I didn't win it. :)

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  48. Replies
    1. Thank you so much Suchi. Am so glad you liked the story. :)

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  49. you’re a great professional for writing it, congrats.

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    1. Thank you very much for the compliment.

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  50. I have been surfing online more than 3 hours these days, yet I by no means found any attention-grabbing article like yours. It is beautiful value enough for me. In my opinion, if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you did, the web will probably be a lot more useful than ever before.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Sir ji , been a month where are you :)

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    1. Sorrry... Have been busy with lots of work sirji.. but now I am back. :)

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  52. Raj, you have not posted anything since I last came to this blog! What happened! Post please...your writings are lovely...

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    Replies
    1. Bhavana.. I can't tell you how much this comment means to me. :) It is such beautiful words that motivate me to write more. Thank you so much. :)

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